Trying to make it work.

I really wanted to do something positive for myself and help others. I opened a recovery house that I rented, while this house was being remodeled. This was a good deal, because the owner who was doing the remodel was open to designing the house and it's rooms so I could have as many rooms as possible. This worked out well for a while. I had an apartment in the back of the house where two apartments were available and I rented one to have some private space. This house worked out well and then I was given the opportunity to rent a very old Victorian house that was 100 years old. I set this house up the same way vI had the previous house and tried to get people in recovery to move in, which some people did, but they were not into recovery. You never know what somebody wants to do until you let them live there for a while. I made a mistake about who I rented to. Most of the new tenants were not interested in a sober recovery program. When these new renters were not into the recovery program that I wanted. So instead of working all the problems out I let myself get into a negative thought pattern. I started using drugs and drinking again, which led to this house failing and myself ending up in the hospital again. Unfortunately, this experiment failed and took my successes at the other house down with it. IU let my pain and personal problems destroy another good effort to do something right. This was becoming a to familiar pattern of failure I was tired of, but not overcoming on my own. I need to say despite all these negative occurrences with attempting to control pain, I finally succeeded many years ago getting it all under control. I do not drink like I once did and my medications have worked well for me for seven years now.
11:02